Have you ever been addicted to anything? Some intoxicant, or video games or a sport, some habit of yours, the smell of something, the taste of something or anything that can cause addiction? Presence of someone, her face, her smile, a little curl of her hair, her aroma, her touch and there’s so much! Yes, I am addicted to her. But like every intoxicant, ills are destroying me, cell by cell. She is not permanent, one day she has to go, and the thought alone is like my liver drained in years of rum, which is killing me. So, why can’t I let her go? Try asking a chain smoker to quit smoking.
I guess I am addicted
It starts with an approach, goes on with efforts, then comes the sanitary warnings; nothing can happen between us, it’s not gonna last for long, you’ll end up hurting yourself and blah blah. Here, ignorance is the best thing to do because we are curious to try everything, even at worst situations. Time passes, and before we know it, we are stuck, deep in emotions and tangled with the veins.
Why I Never walked away
It feels like slowly rolling down a slide of velvet to end nowhere. It feels like drowning in the tank of sweetest wine ever. It’s not like we can’t find a way out. Then again, why to struggle, why make efforts more than my capacity and then throw away the best moments of ecstasy.
This is the last time
I don’t know how it will end or when it ends. Will I be able to recover from it? How much destruction will it bring to me? How much time will I take to recover? You see, these questions arise in my mind many times a day, and I still haven’t found something that will answer any of those.